Guide to Making Amends in Addiction Recovery: Step 9 of AA

alcoholics anonymous living amends

Daily self-reflection and action are encouraged as part of the twelve steps in order to maintain spiritual progress. One commits to identifying and correcting missteps before they escalate as well as fostering emotional balance and self-awareness. As a result of this work, one develops greater tolerance, patience, kindness, and self-awareness ultimately opening oneself up to the healing power of a God, as one understands God. These benefits, based in the willingness to change, brings one a sense of peace and faith that touches all areas of one’s life. It’s hard to find the right response to someone making amends. You likely have a lot of emotions surrounding the situation.

How To Make 9th Step Amends In Recovery

Many alcoholics are guided through the steps by a sponsor, but some individuals complete the steps on their own. AA’s step work has been adjusted for use in other addiction recovery programs, such as sex addiction or drug addiction. It is important to note that just because you have made amends does not mean drug addiction treatment that your relationships will be completely healed or return back to normal. The goal of this step is to help you recognize the damage drinking or drug use caused and to work towards rebuilding social support systems and mending relationships. This leads to personal growth and plays an important part in your recovery as you move forward towards sobriety.

Asking Forgiveness

alcoholics anonymous living amends

To complete this step, you must be https://ecosoberhouse.com/ willing to admit to and face the impacts your past has had on your life and others’ lives. Many AA participants find that dividing up the list you created in the 8th step helps them approach step 9. In detail, write everything you’ve done that caused them pain. Don’t skip details; just because you want to forget doesn’t mean those you’ve hurt have.

When Direct Amends Do More Harm Than Good

However, it is an important step to find something more powerful than yourself, which can guide you and inspire you to stay sober. The higher power can be God, some other supreme being, or anything that has a lot of meaning for you, such as art, music, nature, humanity, or science. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

Gender-Specific Programs for Adults

To really forgive yourself and move on to your new life, you need to take responsibility for past actions and come to accept them. This means you may end up admitting that you owe amends to people you hate or who have caused you harm. AA Twelve Step programs offer support and acceptance from a loving, non-judgmental community. As an AA member, the social support you receive through sponsorships and meetings can play a vital role in helping you stay clean. Moreover, the 12 steps help to rebuild relationships with loved ones and develop a support network for the future. This can be challenging but is an important step to living amends continue progressing in recovery.

How To Rebuild Relationships

alcoholics anonymous living amends

These interactions are essential in rebuilding trust and promoting healing for both parties involved. However, it’s equally important to recognize when making amends might cause further harm. Step 9 advises against making amends if it risks additional harm to the other party. This balance ensures that the process of making amends is constructive rather than detrimental. The first is when you take actions (donate, volunteer, etc.) whenever you can’t directly reach out to the affected person. Going by this take, you can think of living amends as a replacement for direct amends in step nine.

  • Our team of experienced and compassionate therapists and counselors guides clients through every step of the recovery process.
  • One purpose of step 9 is to restore healthy relationships and for this reason, everything must be considered.
  • It requires more than just a simple apology; it involves taking concrete actions to rectify past wrongs and demonstrating a commitment to change.
  • Our Programs serve Maricopa County and the surrounding cities and regions with evidence-based behavioral healthcare provided by individuals passionate about recovery.
  • This service to others is paramount because without it, Alcoholics Anonymous would not exist.
  • They provide a path toward integrity, accountability, spiritual connection, and healing—gifts that anyone, from any walk of life, can benefit from.

Teen & Young Adult Treatment Tracks

alcoholics anonymous living amends

This process is not focused on seeking forgiveness but rather on taking responsibility for our past actions. By demonstrating accountability, we can break free from the cycle of shame and create healthier, more positive relationships moving forward. An amends letter can be a powerful way to communicate intentions when direct communication is not possible.

This is one of the best tools to make amends with a deceased loved one. Generally, AA participants should aim to make full amends as early as possible. But only as long as it causes no additional harm to the people you’re addressing.

Misconceptions About the 12 Steps

  • Therefore, joining AA groups and attending meetings are highly encouraged to support one’s Twelve Step work.
  • She wants to acknowledge her poor judgment, answer any questions Sarah may still have, and make things right.
  • This can take a very long time, months or even a year for some, but you shouldn’t rush it.
  • By humbly letting go of negative behaviors and beliefs, we create space for new growth and improved relationships with others.

To make direct amends, it is important we are willing to make amends to the person face-to-face, no matter what happens, and respond in love and tolerance to anything they say. These interactions foster sincerity and openness, essential for the healing process. When first writing your list, don’t worry about including everyone you have wronged. Over time, as you strengthen and deepen your recovery from addiction, you will undoubtedly revisit Steps 8 and 9 many times. Eventually you will find you are making amends day by day through the positive actions you routinely take in living by Twelve Step principles. No matter how much we feel the need to make things right, forcing another to meet with us or hear from us is not part of the Steps.

Defining the Concept of Making Amends in Recovery

If you or a loved one is struggling with addiction, get in touch with us today and start your journey of recovery. Generally speaking, they involve members speaking about their drinking and the actions they took to stop drinking. In-person meetings typically take place in churches, recreational centers, clubhouses, treatment centers, and office buildings. Some take place in outdoor settings such as parks and beaches. A common AA meeting format is where a leader or chair selects a topic for discussion. After the meeting, people may introduce themselves and socialize.

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